NEED A FIX? (THINK TWICE)

Beth Amphetamine
gonna get you... SNEAK ATTACK!
WHACK! SMACK! thru the pack!

ROCK (AND ROLL) THE VOTE

derby soars in polls!
Super Tuesday prediction:
skate chicks smack McCain!

SWITCHBLADE STRATEGY

Varla contemplates.
Hell's Belles! Must defend the dolls!
...bump-n-booty block

DOUBLE CROSSER XX DOUBLE TIME

Peg Legs' power jam
rounds the track in less than 10
zippity do dah!

GIGANTOR'S NEMESIS

Tall Drinka Slaughter
she don't need no brass knuckles
she six eight on wheelz

SKATER TOTS '08

rookies take the stage
stumble, bumble, rumble, score!
look nice, but... they bite!

DOUBLE VISION, DERBY STYLE

chicks. lightening fast.
skates afire. electric slide.
zooma. zooma. zoom.

MALICIOUS INTENT

Malice on her tail
Switchblade Sister, chained no more
Vendetta whoop ass!

EVIL IS AS EVIL DOES

derby inferno
bedeviled babe with pitch fork
BEWARE! Belle Diablo

BURN, BABY, BURN

hot wheelz Vendetta:
loop-de-loops around the track.
flame throwing wonder!

SPICY HOT JAM

star-spotted helmet
turbo-charged, hot tamale
jammeriffic babe!

IF DOROTHY DERBY-ED...

Kansas would rock, spin
the witch would whirl; monkeys fly
what a WICKED jam!

IT'S ALL HAPPENING AT THE ZOO

derby zoo freak show
lioness in fishnets - - ROAR!
roller jungle jam!

SEW ME UP

stitches here and there
derby drama souvenirs
"X" marks the spot, YO!

SHE'S A BAD MAMMA JAMMA

derby zoom-a-zoom
FAST - - like a speeding bullet
VARLA POWER JAM!

GIRLS ON A MISSION

SMASH! CRASH! strut your stuff
windy city rollergirls
spank, rattle and roll

HI-YAH!

derby girlz got skillz
like Hong Kong Phooey on wheelz
karate CHOP! POW!

DERBY BASICS

SMASH. into side wall.
TAKE DOWN. chick with skull tattoo.
SNEER. skate on by. SMILE.

KEEPING UP APPEARANCES

tuff girlz talking trash
beneath the din of derby
quiet courage reigns

DOUBLE CROSSED ON A SATURDAY NIGHT

CHICKS. so hot 2 trot.
JAM. a ruff roller rumble.
BANG. BANG. coco rocks.

TRIX OF THE TRADE

ready 2 rumble?
bad girlz converge on the track
SMACK! POW! GRAB, now JAB!

ROLLER DERBY AFTER DARK

fierce, pierced, and tattooed
she skates the flat track by day
dark alleys by night

BABES WITH BRASS KNUCKLES

chicago girlz know
RULES were meant 2 be broken...
not to mention legs

BITE YOUR TONGUE

sure, they look good but...
MAN, are they mean, mad mamas!!
skatergirls: sharp teeth!

DERBY DOLLS REUNITE JANUARY 26

spin cycle heats up
derby dolls, 4 wheelz each foot
venom in their hearts!

COUNTDOWN TO DERBY

lace up your skates, girls!
all roads lead to Cicero
derby sparks will FLY!

X-RAY VISION

CRUNCH! spiral fracture.
broken bits. so black-n-blue.
skate your fate, bad girl!

MIRACULOUS CORN

fields of golden maize,
Hoosier Mama emerges.
yo! powered by corn!

THE DIABLO INSIDE

beautiful devil.
she loca. she so speedy!
Belle Diablo... rocks!

WHO'S WHO IN DERBY

jammers jab. jolt. jinx.
blockers bump. beat. bang. bop. bash.
pivots pop. protect.

SMILE, BABY, SMILE

MEAN. mama on wheels.
SPIN. your partner round-n-round.
GONE. two front teeth. GRRRR.

SATURDAY NIGHT FEVER

SPIT. spunk. spank. splat. spill.
HOT. saturday nite smackdown!
BIG. hematoma.

GO 4 THE GUSTO

chase or be chased, girl.
Speed McQueen comes from behind.
don't look now - - crunch! munch!

CLEAN UP IN AISLE 4

race ya down the aisles
grocery shopping derby style
creamed corn: new meaning